[ Another point in Thranduil's favor! The blanket is folded and put away before Xingchen goes looking, and he smiles warmly when the elf stands. The sweet kitten gets an answering nuzzle, of course! ]
I am, thank you. I apologize - I should have warned you that I sometimes nap in the afternoon.
{He can't resist reaching out and stroking the kitten's fuzzy face. She has a mothering instinct and he is amused that someone like Xiao Xingchen has, more or less, been "adopted" by her.}
You needn't warn me. I was concerned. {Thranduil hesitates, choosing his words carefully.} If you wish to speak of anything, I will listen. My experience could be put to some use.
[ Xingchen's smile brightens as the black kitten rubs her face against the elf's hand, purring approvingly at him. ]
A-Yang found this one for me and brought her home. [ Months ago now. ] Her sibling moved in a few days later.
[ The expression of concern, along with the offer, has his cheeks pink a little and his gaze drops to dark fur. It's tempting, but eventually he shakes his head a little. ]
You are very kind. I know...what might make me...whole, but I do not wish this place on him.
{His fingers are light, rubbing a gentle line towards her forehead. She is a happy child and he recalls seeing the other cat too - also female, he notes - and sensing that she is equally joyful and open with her affection.}
You have given them a home and they are grateful. {Animals are not ashamed to pour out gratitude to the hands that save them. Pride can interfere with so much and, as a result, Men and Elves alike lose opportunities to tell the truth of their hearts.}
I lost my wife. {Thranduil softens his voice upon seeing Xingchen's reaction.} I know that pain.
[ The feline bats at Xingchen's cheek with a soft paw and he can't help the soft chuckle, and nuzzles her paw. Both kittens are spoiled with love and everything they need. And they return that love with all their tiny hearts.
Xingchen blinks up at the confiding, heart aching for Thranduil's loss. ]
I cannot imagine your pain. Zichen - he's...not dead...but he told me never to come near him again. I...have always done what I could to honor that request.
Then there is time. {Thranduil looks perplexed. Granted, he has not known Xingchen long at all, but it is difficult for him to imagine anyone telling this Man to leave their side. Especially if the bond they had shared was mutual.}
Forgive me. {He motions to a chair.} You should rest. With your spirit in that state, I can understand your fatigue.
[ They haven't known each other long at all, but he still feels he can trust Thranduil. Even...with this. So, while his smile turns sad, he shakes his head before tugging the collar of his robe out of the way to show the scar on his neck. ]
All the time I have is what I spend here. I took my life and wished never to be reborn. Xue Yang told me there was very little left of my spirit by the time he realized what I'd done - nothing can bring me back.
{The truth leaves him cold. Death continues to take and take without any sign of being weary of the pain it causes. His lips thin and he observes the scar, noting the length and depth of it. Yes, there would be no saving Xingchen from that.}
May I ask how it happened? How could Xue Yang have been present and - {failed to save you? He had seen the strength of their bond. There had to have been a chance.}
[ Finally he takes the seat offered, a sigh escaping as he settles and he turns his attention to the sweet kitten, leaning pointedly against him and rumbling to try and ease his distress. ]
I...surprised him...He did not realize how he felt until it was...too late. I...shattered. [ There is no strength to his voice as he answers. ]
Then I came here. And Xue Yang was here, again, following. Eventually we...learned how to lean on each other. He learned how to piece me together, and hold me together each time I start to break.
He...is the one person who...has never cast me aside out of anger, despite all the pain he has caused. He was...wounded. But we heal, together.
{Emotions are confusing at best; pure chaos at worst. Thranduil hears the frailty and he moves to Xingchen's side, pressing the back of his fingers against his cheek. He senses no poison, no fever, but this Man does ail. His heart has grown weak - too wounded to carry on - and Thranduil is uncertain how to heal him.}
What can I do for you? {He could promise to never cast Xingchen aside - he has no desire to do so - however actions speak much louder than words in that case. Besides, he has no control over how long he stays.}
{A long time ago, he had felt the hands of a true Healer. His are pathetic in comparison, but he offers what comfort he can.}
Love is the greatest gift, however peace is not far behind it. Your tale should not have ended as it did, Xiao Xingchen. I am relieved you can rectify those wrongs - to some degree - here.
A-Yang helps every day. He is unwavering in his support, trust, and love. He makes me laugh. He is...warm. He is not the same man he was before, even if not all who knew him then can see it now.
I...would like to help you, if I could. If it becomes possible and you would allow me to.
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I am, thank you. I apologize - I should have warned you that I sometimes nap in the afternoon.
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You needn't warn me. I was concerned. {Thranduil hesitates, choosing his words carefully.} If you wish to speak of anything, I will listen. My experience could be put to some use.
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A-Yang found this one for me and brought her home. [ Months ago now. ] Her sibling moved in a few days later.
[ The expression of concern, along with the offer, has his cheeks pink a little and his gaze drops to dark fur. It's tempting, but eventually he shakes his head a little. ]
You are very kind. I know...what might make me...whole, but I do not wish this place on him.
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You have given them a home and they are grateful. {Animals are not ashamed to pour out gratitude to the hands that save them. Pride can interfere with so much and, as a result, Men and Elves alike lose opportunities to tell the truth of their hearts.}
I lost my wife. {Thranduil softens his voice upon seeing Xingchen's reaction.} I know that pain.
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Xingchen blinks up at the confiding, heart aching for Thranduil's loss. ]
I cannot imagine your pain. Zichen - he's...not dead...but he told me never to come near him again. I...have always done what I could to honor that request.
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Forgive me. {He motions to a chair.} You should rest. With your spirit in that state, I can understand your fatigue.
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All the time I have is what I spend here. I took my life and wished never to be reborn. Xue Yang told me there was very little left of my spirit by the time he realized what I'd done - nothing can bring me back.
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May I ask how it happened? How could Xue Yang have been present and - {failed to save you? He had seen the strength of their bond. There had to have been a chance.}
omg I lost this notif! o.o
I...surprised him...He did not realize how he felt until it was...too late. I...shattered. [ There is no strength to his voice as he answers. ]
Then I came here. And Xue Yang was here, again, following. Eventually we...learned how to lean on each other. He learned how to piece me together, and hold me together each time I start to break.
He...is the one person who...has never cast me aside out of anger, despite all the pain he has caused. He was...wounded. But we heal, together.
how dare you. >8(
What can I do for you? {He could promise to never cast Xingchen aside - he has no desire to do so - however actions speak much louder than words in that case. Besides, he has no control over how long he stays.}
/clings to leeeeeeeeeeeeeg/ FORGIVE MEEEEEEEEEEEE
Be yourself, my friend. I think you are a kind, strong individual. There is a peace about you that helps.
/picks up and smooches <3 Okay~
Love is the greatest gift, however peace is not far behind it. Your tale should not have ended as it did, Xiao Xingchen. I am relieved you can rectify those wrongs - to some degree - here.
I would give much to do likewise.
/wiggles up to/ Yay!
Few can compare to Elrond!]A-Yang helps every day. He is unwavering in his support, trust, and love. He makes me laugh. He is...warm. He is not the same man he was before, even if not all who knew him then can see it now.
I...would like to help you, if I could. If it becomes possible and you would allow me to.
/keeps <3
{Thranduil has seen the sort of violent madness loss can cause.}
I do not know how you could. My son and my people are not present.